And I'm back...

Sorry for the extra long vacay.  New jobs, new diets and trips just got in the way.  

No excuses you say?

Well, let me begin with a recipe from this past weekend.

I had to work at a booth for my job at a farm fair this past Saturday.  I really wanted to buy a funnel cake, but I didn't think my work would appreciate their representative covered in powdered sugar.  I also didn't want the additional calories...sort of.  What really shocked me was the amount of people only eating a small portion and throwing away the rest.  When I got in line, I couldn't believe that one funnel cake was $7.00.  What?!!  There had to be a way of making them for less calories and $$.

Here it is!  Funnel cakes with lime zest.

- 1.5 cups of Bisquick
- .5 cup of hot water
- zest from 1 lime
- a lot of powdered sugar
- olive oil for frying

Add about a half inch of oil to your skillet and heat to medium. Mix the hot water with the Bisquick and lime zest until you get the consistency of pancake batter.  When the oil is hot enough (test with a few drops of batter), place batter in a zip loc bag and cut a small tip off one of the ends.  Push the batter through the hole into the oil in circular shapes.  Flip once, when the cake is golden brown.  When finished, place on paper towels to drain excess oil and cover with powdered sugar.

Enjoy!

Chocolate covered bacon

Thanks, Santa!

Biscuits and Milk Gravy

My weekday breakfast routine consists of either a bagel or fiber bar and a coffee on the go. Weekend breakfast? One word: Bacon. Actually, bacon AND bacon fat.

I love the weekends.

Here is Paula Deen's recipe for biscuits. I used White Lily flour instead of AP and placed them in the oven at 425 degrees for 20 minutes.

Note: Paula omitted the temperature information for the oven. Michael must have interrupted her when writing the recipe.

I also decided to not roll them out and save time by making them drop biscuits.



While those are baking, I make milk gravy.

- 2 strips of bacon, cut into small pieces
- 1/2 tbs of butter
- 1 tsp of olive oil
- 2 tbs of flour
- 1 cup of warm milk

Cook the bacon in a frying pan until crisp; set aside.

Keep about 1 tbs of bacon fat in the pan. Add the butter and olive oil and melt. Spoon the flour into the frying pan and cook until golden brown. Add the warm milk and keep stirring until mixture turns into a thin gravy.

When the biscuits are cooked, put the bacon pieces back into the gravy.

Cherpumple

Yeah, yeah, mom. Sorry I have not updated this thing in months. While my running and healthy diet efforts are nothing for a foodie to blog about...I can thank Charles Phoenix for adding me to his site for attempting the Cherpumple.

click here

I'll post more pics and the recipe later, but here is one pic of the group enjoying the creation.

Bahn Mi

Tasty, tasty pork sub. Finally gaining popularity in the states, this sandwich layers the best of Vietnamese and French cooking. There are tons of variations online and most people will...annoyingly...protest if you add or subtract from the traditional recipe. What IS annoying are the lack of grocery stores that will sell the necessary ingredients for the sandwich. I can never find good Vietnamese baguette rolls, pate and daikon.

A similar problem occured about a year ago when trying to find all the ingredients for my student worker's pad thai recipe. She is from Thailand and was kind enough to print out her mother's instructions and grocery list for the dish. I dare ya...go to a supermarket that specializes in hot dogs and ketchup and ask if they have preserved turnip.

*crickets*

I e-mailed her while home and asked if there were any substitutions since I could not find a few items. Her response? "Improvise, Jen! That's what I do! We never have all of the ingredients, so add what you have and be creative!"

What a thought.

In that same spirit, I bring you my version of Bahn Mi.


For 2 sandwiches:

Pork:
- one boneless pork chip, sliced into thin strips
- zest and juice of one orange
- tsp of sesame oil
- chopped ginger
-tbs of vegetable oil
- sriracha sauce

Marinade pork strips with the next five ingredients for at least two hours.

Toppings:
- english cucumber, cut into long strips
- mayonnaise
- hot sesame chili oil
- mango (not traditional, but quite tasty)
- shredded carrots, about half a cup
- rice wine vinegar
- 1/4 tsp of sugar

Mix the carrots with the vinegar and sugar about 20 minutes before making the sandwiches.

Assemble:

Cook the pork quickly (30 seconds to one minute per side) in a hot pan coated in oil. While cooking pork, take two demi baguettes and toast.

Place mayonnaise and as much hot sesame chili oil as you like on the baguettes. Top with pork and the rest of the toppings.

Homemade Chicken Nuggets

Maybe it is easier to buy them off the $1 menu at Wendy's, but why not give it a shot if you have the ingredients. Ya know what I mean?

For 10 nuggets:

- 4 chicken tenderloins

- 2 eggs

- 1 cup buttermilk

- 1 or 2 tbs of heavy cream

- hot sauce

- italian spice mix

- 1/2 cup each panko and flour, combined

- vegetable oil

Marinade the tenderloins overnight in a mixture of buttermilk and hot sauce.

Cut the chicken pieces into small cubes and add them to a food processor with one egg, heavy cream and spice mix. Blend until smooth. Arrange on a plate into nugget shape and refrigerate for one hour.

Heat vegetable oil in a pot, about one inch.

While heating oil, beat the other egg and place into a shallow bowl. Place panko and flour mixture onto a plate. Add nuggets to egg mixture and cover with dry ingredients.

When oil is hot, add nuggets and cook until lightly browned on each side. When cooked, place on paper towel to drain oil and add salt and pepper to taste.

Enjoy with your favorite dippin' sauce. I prefer hot honey mustard. The guy likes bbq. Whatever makes you happy.

Pistachio Macaroon

The perfect lunch dessert.

breakfast pizza

Carbonara pizza. Eggs, cheese and bacon.


I ate the whole thing.

Ratatouille

Remember the Disney movie of the same name? I always wondered what inspired Disney "imagineers" to create a layered version rather than the usual stew. So, I tried my own version...and it was delicious. A mandolin would make the process much easier and also yield more aesthetically pleasing slices.

- 2 baby eggplant, sliced

- 1 zucchini, sliced

- 1 yellow squash, sliced

- 1 small onion, sliced

- 2 cloves of garlic, sliced

- 1 cup canned san marzano tomatoes

- s&p

- fresh spices, whatever ya got

- olive oil

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

Place canned tomatoes in the bottom of a round pie plate.

Arrange onion and garlic on top of the tomatoes.

Arrange the eggplant, squash and zucchini as purty as possible on top of the previous mixture.

Olive oil the top, add s&p and spices. Place in oven for 40 - 45 minutes.

Vanilla Cupcakes

How do you make any lightened version of cupcakes edible? Add a small piece of orange flavored dark chocolate and tsp. of nutella. Ta-da!

I used a Weight Watchers recipe with yogurt, but since my membership ended yesterday, I cannot log-in to get the exact recipe. Cooking Light has similar recipes, though.

Beet Salad

A healthy, quick dish that will make you feel better about that Big Mac Attack earlier.

- 3 large beets

- 2 tbs. olive oil

- 1/2 tbs. champagne vinegar

- 1/2 tbs. honey

- salt and pepper

- 1 orange (zested, segmented and juiced)

Preheat oven to 425 degrees.

Place beets in oven, whole with 1 tbs. of olive oil for 45 - 50 minutes.

Make vinaigrette with remaining olive oil, vinegar, honey, s&p and juice/zest of orange.

When beets are cooked, allow to cool and peel skin. Cut into segments.

Add vinaigrette and orange segments.

Crispy Cornish Hens

Quick, quick, quick dinner.

- cornish hen, butterflied
- Carolina Mustard BBQ Sauce

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Cover cornish hens with BBQ sauce and marinade for a few hours. Bring cast iron skillet to sizzling perfection. Sear hen, skin side down, for 10 minutes. Place in oven for 10-15 minutes.

Let rest on cutting board before cutting for 10 minutes.

Crispy, crispy, crispy.

A foodie's worst nightmare

Two words: Weight Watchers. With the closing of the local farmer's market for the season and my jeans holding on to my muffin top for dear life, I needed an intervention. Yes, pounds have been dropped and I now know that participating in a 5k is not beyond my reach, but the fun of cooking is certainly lost. Looking up every freakin' point and writing down EVERYTHING that I eat encourages me to raise funds for experimental metabolism-booster surgery...kidding. Not really.

While the program has encouraged me to understand the soul-crushing reality of portion sizes, the recipes are far from foodie worthy. Honestly, people, just exercise more instead of cooking a Dr. Frankenstein version of chocolate cake. The "substitutes" are cringe inducing. Typically, these include; liquid egg, gallons of splenda, cans of non-fat whipped topping, sugar-free chocolate milk and fiber cereal for "texture".

These recipes help those who would rather eat a lot instead of a little including quality ingredients. It makes sense; go to Golden Corral and watch the church crowd. "Lord, please bless these three plates of cafeteria food and the free refills of Dr. Pepper. Please allow us to finish in time to watch the (insert NASCAR/football event here) that begins in 20 minutes. In YOUR name we pray!" I can just see Jesus rolling his eyes as he blesses your departure on the gastrc bypass train. Choo-cho!!

Aww, geez.

I'm starting to sound cynical, huh? Must be the lack of carbs. Sorry, everyone.

Accidents happen

When God gives you a disastrous Alton Brown recipe for pumpkin bread that does not cook in the middle, you make bread pudding with the remains the next day.

What it should look like...

What happens after I let it cool and transfer to a wire rack...


The middle. Pumpkin pudding, maybe?

Wok-Seared Lamb Rib Chops

Another restaurant in Las Vegas with a great surprise included Noodle Asia. The menu seemed to cater to the Asian tourist population with authentic goodies and satisfyingly-slurpy noodles. I was very excited about the Kim Chi, and, honestly - very, very excited about the spicy beef tripe. The plan was to feast on some appetizers before our Cirque show, but a *cough* self-induced pistachio gelato feast only an hour earlier left little room in the tummy. The restaurant did have a special, though: Wok-Seared Lamb Rib Chops.

The waitress was very kind, but could not speak English well, so I could only have her release little information about the preparation of the lamb. All I heard was, "Chinese five spice and cook it three times."

Once she delivered the food, I went into full Fred Flintstone, brontosaurus bone, growling-mode. I admit, I'm not a pretty eater. The crispy outside and fatty, spicy meat made me melt. I forced myself from ordering another two rounds, since it was an appetizer and only served with three of the meaty lollipops. Instead, I took notes. The spices are almost perfect, but the intense crispyness can only be found with a wok. For a Wednesday night supper, it wasn't half-bad.


Wok-Seared Lamb Rib Chops

- Frenched lamb rib chop (around 8 lollipops)
Marinade
- 1 tbs ginger
- 1 tbs sesame oil
- 1 tbs vegetable oil
- 3 cloves of garlic (crushed & finely chopped)
- 1/2 tsp Chinese Five Spice
- 1/2 tsp Sriracha
- s & p

Mix the marinade ingredients. Apply to lamb and marinate for a few hours in the fridge. Before cooking, take the lamb out of the fridge and allow to rest for an hour. This prevents the lamb from being too cold and only cooking on the outside. Heat the oven to 325.

Add to a pan on medium-high heat with oil. Sear on both sides until browned. Place lamb in the oven for 20-25 minutes.

After resting the lamb on the counter for 15 minutes, cut eat individual chop off the rib. Heat a pan with oil in high heat. Carefully sear the lamb on each side until crispy, 2-3 minutes on each side.

Enjoy!

I'm gonna miss you, puppy.

Our lovely puppy of twelve years passed yesterday. Heather left us yesterday on her birthday, but we were fortunate to spend a relaxing day with her celebrating with her favorite foods; cheese and cupcakes.

I'll miss her cold wet nose laying next to me on the couch.

I'll miss her stealth-mode when she tries to sneak a taste of our food.

I'll miss her love of food. Remember how excited she was about my birthday cake?

There are lots of memories, but most of all, I'll miss a great friend.

Love ya, pup.

Pumpkin ravioli with fried sage

Our new favorite!



- 1/4 can of canned pumpkin (not pumpkin pie filling)
- 20 wonton wrappers
- 12 fresh sage leaves (6 whole, 6 chopped)
- 2 tbs. butter
- 1 small clove of garlic (minced)
- 2 amaretti cookies (crushed)
- 1 tbs. of parmesan cheese
- orange zest (1/4 of a large orange)
- pepper
- glass of water

Place a skillet on low heat and add butter. Allow to cook and slightly brown.

While cooking butter, mix pumpkin, garlic, cookies, parmesan cheese, chopped sage, orange zest and pepper to taste. Mix and set aside.

Place wonton wrappers on a board with the glass of water close to the working station. Add a teaspoon of pumpkin filling to one corner of the wonton. Leave enough room to seal the ravioli. Place you finger in the water and moisten the edges of the wonton. Fold so it is shaped like a triangle and make sure to seal the edges.

Add to salted water. Cook for 3-4 minutes.

Add remaining fresh whole sage leaves to butter to fry.

Place ravioli in a bowl and pour browned butter with sage on top.

Hip to be square

I don't need another reason to eat cupcakes -- but a square cupcake? Genius! And they're pretty tasty to boot!

Fresh Bakery cupcakes can be purchased in malls in the Baltimore area. We found stations in White Marsh mall and Towson Town center so far. The cupcakes are great - moist, and not too sweet.

The poor girl at the station ran out of red velvet, which are rumored to be fantastic. Pick some up if you are lucky to find them in stock.

Bye-Bye Summer

We've entered Fall and I have been told that my lack of Summer entries is beyond disappointing. I agree. Honestly, nothing too new in the cooking front during these past few warm months. Much of the time was spent attempting to understand the quirks of the stove and oven in our new place.

We always have a crab feast during the month of July, and apparently, my family shows great architecture promise for crustacean shells.

We also drive to Kilby Cream in Rising Sun, MD to end great dinners with fresh milk ice cream creations. Check it out in the Fall for a corn maze along with seasonal ice cream flavors.


You can also get close and personal to these wonderful farmyard animals.


Including this one...

These are a few of my favorite things.

I'm not picky when it comes to food items, but my limited selection on the "do not consume" list always perks the interest of family and friends. Maybe finally admitting my culinary dislikes will help me, and others, to understand my...silly ways.

You will never find these in my kitchen.

- parsley

- cilantro

- ranch sauce

- alfredo sauce

- arugula

- celery

Let's also consider my "hate-to-love" food list. The guilty (and embarrassing) pleasures. The over-processed abundance of our grocery shelves and fast food drive-thru.

- KFC mac and cheese (neon cheesy goodness)

- microwaved Peeps

- KFC coleslaw

- Burger King's "onion" rings

- birthday cake icing (fabulous food coloring and lard)